Look for the Good--Everyday Moments

 

Look for the Good

I have kept a journal almost daily for the past eight or nine years.  Sometimes I have a lot to share, sometimes a little.  I try to find something I am grateful for to share with each entry.  Last night I was struggling to think of something, anything, to write.  It had been a difficult day: I was tired and not feeling well, we had some plans for the day that fell through, dinner was late, our baby was clingy so I had a hard time getting anything done, I was grouchy.

So I fell back on my old stand-by.  I looked for the good things I did that day and wrote about them.  It went something like this:

Today I hugged and kissed my children and told them I love them.  I hugged and kissed my husband and told him I love him.  I nursed and cared for my baby.  I made black bean burgers and french fries for dinner.  I sat on the couch with my family and watched old episodes of The Lone Ranger.  I took care of our neighbor's chickens.  I cleaned out the tomatoes, peppers and herbs from my garden....

There was a lot of good in my day, but it was overshadowed by the not-so-good until I sought it out.

We know we should be looking for the good in others, but do we remember to look for it in ourselves?  My challenge to you is this: when you have a hard day and need a reminder of the progress you have made and the good you are accomplishing in spite of your imperfections, take a few minutes to notice and write down the good you did that day.  It is there, I promise.

Photo credit: AltonST Photography

A Dose of Real Life and a Metaphor

Real life: I have five gloriously alive children.  That means that right now, I have a pile of sleeping bags in my office area (we call it the library, though no books live there) from when my kids camped out in the backyard last week.  We hung out in the basement all yesterday afternoon, ignoring necessary housework and meal preparation, because it was just hot.  I read aloud and my kids played with K'Nex and Construx and Monopoly, which are all still out on the basement floor, accompanied by a fort/coop that my 4-year-old and 6-year-old built out of the wood their daddy stores down there for his woodworking.  We ate leftover pancakes and frozen grapes for dinner (at 9 pm) because it was just too hot to cook.  We went to bed late.

This morning, I woke up with my baby at 5:30, changed her diaper and went back to bed (with her) until 7:30.  Janie came in to play with Rebecca and crawled into bed with us.  I closed all the windows and blinds.  The boys got up early and went back to their Monopoly game, and were fighting about it when I called them away for prayer.   (That is an essential first step for the day.  We can always tell if we miss it because my kids are at each other more than usual all day long.)  It's 10 am and we haven't had breakfast yet.  It was 81 degrees in my house this morning, after a night of leaving windows open and running window fans.  It was 92 inside last night.  I sent the kids out with a jar of water balloons to fill so they could be outside and (hopefully) stop bickering.  The baby is messy and covered with juice and syrup from their pickup breakfast (more leftover pancakes and grapes).  She is happy and sweet, and the older kids are happy and healthy and creative and fun.  The heat gets to us all, but we love each other and we really are getting better about being kind.

Real life is messy.  It is hard.  And it is glorious.  I make mistakes all the time.  I don't know what I am doing much of the time, with my family or in any other responsibility.  I'm just doing the best I can, and I fall down regularly, and then I get up again and keep trying.  So much of life we learn on the job.  I believe that God is much more merciful with us than we are with ourselves.  He doesn't want us to feel bad all the time, to feel like failures because we aren't doing everything just right.  He loves us, and He knows that we are trying, and that is good enough for Him.

Now for a metaphor:
When my sweet babies learn to walk, it is difficult for them.  They see other people walking and want to do it too, but they fall down a lot at first.  We encourage them to get up and keep trying.  We tell them they are doing great, even when they fall down, because they are!  We know that the trying and failing are part of the process of learning.  So we cheer them on and clap for them and we are so excited for them when they finally get it.  And they are so proud of themselves.
Can you imagine someone following their baby around, criticizing him because he couldn't walk yet?  Saying, "What is wrong with you?  Why can't you get this?  Why is this so hard for you?  Your sister can walk!  She could walk when she was younger than you are!  You just aren't trying hard enough!"  You would think that parent was crazy!  But we do it to ourselves all the time!  Can't you see that it is the same principle?
Chances are, whatever role you play in your life right now, you are learning as you go.  You started out with that responsibility not knowing how to do it.  But you didn't let that hold you back.  You were brave enough to try anyway.  Maybe, just maybe, we should put away the constant mental criticism that is following us around ("What is wrong with me?  Why is it so hard for me to get this right?  I should be better than this!") and instead cheer ourselves on.  We are all, figuratively, learning to walk.  We want to do it, it is in our nature to be able to do it, but we have to learn one step at a time just like everyone else.  Some have better examples to follow than others, but we all have to learn to take the steps for ourselves.  Wouldn't it be better to say something like this?  "You can do this.  You are doing great!  Look how far you've come.  Look how much better you are doing than yesterday, or last month, or last year!  You are going to get this if you just keep trying."  I believe that is what our Heavenly Father is saying to us, if we would only take the time to listen.  He doesn't want us to get discouraged and give up.  He wants us to keep trying.  He knows that if we do, we will eventually get there.  This life is not an exercise in doing everything right.  It is a learning experience, learning how to "walk" over and over and over again until we have attained our true potential.  So be patient, and keep trying, and you will get there.  And you will know what it took to get there, how much work you put in, and you will be glad.

Sunday, Sunday

I feel like I should share this--hopefully it will be helpful to someone.  We have been working on keeping the Sabbath day holy, figuring out what that means to us, for a long time.  Finally I realized it isn't about the do's and don'ts, it's about (for me) showing the Lord that I value what He has given me,  and don't take it for granted.  How can I do this?  By prioritizing His gifts--taking time away from my own hobbies and everyday duties and giving it to Him and to my family.  I put together this list of ideas to help us make the Sabbath day special and set it apart from the rest of the week.  My plan is to refer my children to it on Sunday afternoons when we are home from church and the day stretches ahead of us.  It is a reminder for me and my husband as well, to help us line up our activities with our priorities on this holy day.  Included in this list are some things that are specific to our family, some that are specific to our faith, and some to our location.  You are welcome to modify it for your own family and circumstances.  God bless us all as we seek to keep the Sabbath in our own way!

Sunday Activity Ideas

The Heart of a Child

My in-laws had a quail's nest in their planter this summer, with a mother quail and several eggs. One day when they looked at it they found the mother quail gone and feathers all around. The mother had been killed by a cat or coyote wandering the neighborhood, and her eggs were left unprotected. Then, the eggs started hatching. My husband brought the chicks and remaining eggs home with him--they were adorable!--and we took them to a bird lady in Phoenix who knew how to care for them so they could survive.

As we were driving out to Phoenix, we had a discussion about how precious life is and how important it is to protect those who are weaker or more vulnerable than we are. It was a powerful object lesson for my children, one they still talk about. Who can look at a baby bird and not want to protect it and take care of it? That feeling comes from God, and it is strong in little children. If only we could all keep that pure child-heart! I think the world would be a much better place.